Jennifer and Frank

This memorial website is dedicated in loving memory to Jennifer (Jenf) my much better half – who I so terribly miss.

In loving memory…

Is a loving memory of a loved one that passed away the ultimate definer of our lives?

What are our lives but a collection of memories? Memories of events, experiences, emotions, all stamped onto our nervous systems, all leading to here and now, making each of us the person we are today. Without memories, the present would be void of context. Void of the moments of life that make a life. Void of the substance that defines each of us.

A memory isn’t simply a thing you have. Its a promise. Its a vow to the one you love. Remembering is a search.

We think of memories as filed-away facts stored safely in the brain, when actually, everything that’s happened to us since the event we remember has altered the memory of that event, providing a new filter through which we experience it, a filter that changes and forgets, exaggerates and combines – morphs. But the pure experience still lives within us because the brain has the ability to remember every event that’s ever happened to us, down to the greatest of detail. The problem is, we have no way to clear the filters of time and get back to the truth unless we have a snapshot or video to trigger a detailed memory.

We define our lives by our memories. Who we are on a particular day is the result of memories from every day before. Memories of true happiness are what make life worth living, but they are so often lost in a sea of bad ones. We are nothing more than the memories we keep. Memories of overwhelming joy, profound sadness, gratitude, pride, grief, despair, remorse, passion, and regret…

The strongest memories we carry with us are ones of hope, and love. We’re all the remains of unfulfilled dreams. We are just the sum of our memories.

I will forever be so grateful to have made a lifetime of memories with my much better half – Jenf.

I hope you will join me to pass on your feelings and memories of Jenf’s time with you and yours. Since this memorial website is in the cloud, Jenf must be able to see and hear us.

Look how tall Jenf is!

Jenf and I were married for 50 years, 6 months and 10 days, and we were together for nearly 52 years. (its not enough…) When vanity license plates first came out, I requested “notenuf” but was turned down. The sentiment sure fits my enduring feelings that all our time together, is not enough.

I never really thought of a world without Jenf in it.

Yes Love, Always.

Sometimes, we had to travel without each other. I’d say and write, “If I could be in two places at one time, I’d be with you!”

If
by B.R.E.A.D.

If a picture paints a thousand words,
Then why can’t I paint you?
The words will never show the you I’ve come to know.
If a face could launch a thousand ships,
Then where am I to go?
There’s no one home but you,
You’re all that’s left me too.
And when my love for life is running dry,
You come and pour yourself on me.
If a man could be two places at one time,
I’d be with you.
Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way.

There are so many ways I could say:
I would give everything I own just to have you back again 🙁

Everything I Own
by B.R.E.A.D.

You sheltered me from harm
Kept me warm, kept me warm
You gave my life to me
Set me free, set me free
The finest years I ever knew
Were all the years I had with you
And I would give anything I own
Give up my life, my heart, my home
I would give everything I own
Just to have you back again
You taught me how to love
What it’s of, what it’s of
You never said too much
But still you showed the way
And I knew from watching you
Nobody else could ever know
The part of me that can’t let go
And I would give anything I own
Give up my life, my heart, my home
I would give everything I own
Just to have you back again

Remember Me
by American Greetings
(Think of Jennifer, in charge, in the cloud)

Remember me,
In rainbows, sunshine, starry skies,
In flowers, birds or butterflies,
In scents or songs or special days,
In quiet, sweet or funny ways.
If something sparks a memory
and you think its a sign from me,
Then I hope you’ll believe its true,
I’ll always be a part of you.
There are countless ways I’ll never be forgotten.
Wishing you comfort in every one.

History:

We bought domain name jenniferandfrank.com on 12-17-1999 and we used it for vanity email. Wish it still was… alas…

In loving memory,
Jennifer (Jenf) (Ma)
8-11-1945 to 11-6-2019

Elton John wrote,
How wonderful life is
while you’re in the world.
(but now the story goes…)

I met Jenf in Hollywood, California in a for-teens pub in 1967 when I was 17.
Ah, the 60’s…

After a year or so of getting to know each other and living together for a time, I proposed at Billingsly’s Restaurant and Jenf accepted. Of course, I needed my Mother’s permission to get married in Las Vegas at age 18, and she gave it. So many said, “It will never last!”

We were married on April 23, 1969. Jenf was late for the wedding! Got lost while she was looking for a parking space on the way to the Chapel. We’re old-traditional, and because of that, Jennifer stayed with her family the night before our wedding.

What did she see in me?

I was incorrigible before meeting and falling in love with Jennifer, but was cured by the relationship I wanted and needed with my soul mate. I started work at Rasco Gambles Warehouse before our marriage then went to J.J. Newberry Warehouse for more pay – we really needed it – from $2.35/hr to $2.85/hr. We spent a week-long honeymoon in San Felipe, Baja California and loved shopping in Tijuana. We still have trinkets that we bought in Tijuana on our honeymoon. When we got back, I started work at Edcliff Instruments as a Technician making aircraft transducers. I’ve worked during our entire marriage – still working, even today. I was independent at 17 but Jenf didn’t become independent until she turned 21. Jennifer was 23 when we got married, surviving in Hollywood, CA. Jenf was able to raise our Son and stay at home until he turned 8, then she volunteered at Five Fountains. After a few months, Jenf got hired and worked for nearly 30 years at a job she loved. Got a plaque at 20 years and Ma retired in 2011.

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Ma passed away in her sleep on November 6, 2019, at 1:43am (according to her Fitbit). Ma forever said, “When I go, I want to go in my sleep, just like Grandma!”

Damn, if Ma didn’t go the way she wanted…

“Yes Love, Always!”

(but Love, we were supposed to go together…)

I knew the moment when, she touched me…

You Are the Love of My Life
by George Benson

You are the love of my life
I knew it right from the start
The moment I looked at you
You found a place in my heart
You are the love of my life
You give me reason to live
You taught me how to be strong
With you is where I belong
No one’s ever touched me
Quite the way you touched me
People search a lifetime
To find what we have
You are the love of my life
One thing that’s good in this life
I’ll spend the rest of my days
Just loving you
You are the love of my life
The heart and soul of my life
Once I was lost and alone
With you at last I am home
You give me so much of you
And leave me room to be free
No one’s ever touched me
Quite the way you touched me
People search a lifetime
To find what we have
You are the love of my life
One thing that’s good in this life
And in a world full of change
One thing I’m sure of
You are the love of my life
The one thing that makes sense in this life
I’ll spend the rest of my days
Just loving you
You are the love of my life
And I thank god I’m alive
To spend my lifetime with you
You are the love of my life

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Its amazing how Ma’s bones settled over the years!

In loving memory for my much better half.

Jennifer (Jenf) (Ma)
8-11-1945 to 11-6-2019